A New Approach To Town Sports

Photo by Taylor Rooney on Unsplash

I have two children active in town sports (basketball, soccer, baseball, and lacrosse). Recently, my wife and I were discussing how teams are selected and I stumbled across an idea about how to approach town sports.


Here's the idea: the specific sports board or committee host a parent and player session where they lay out the philosophy of coaching, selection and sport goals for the year. Parents are encouraged to set expectations with their children in this regard, which will help minimize heartache (although not removing it totally because disappointment is part of life and worth experiencing and working through).Coaches coach towards these specific goals. Selectors choose teams based on these goals and make their selection criteria public and share with parents the status of their child's selection criteria. This openness helps parents and players navigate the season well.

For example: a sport decides that their philosophy is total player development in skill and character, teamwork and enjoyment. Teams are selected to develop all players equally with teamwork as the goal not winning. Coach coach toward skill and character development and parents support and reward through cheering the achievement of these goals rather than individual focus and cheering reward. Travel/tournament teams are selected with this in mind and players who exemplify these criteria are selected.

A different example: a sport decides that their philosophy is winning with a focus on developing talented players and providing resources towards the goal of winning as they define it. Parents are encouraged to set expectations with their children in this regard. Coaches coach toward skill and team development with win-loss as the metric. Travel/tournament teams are selected for winning.

There are many examples and blends of these examples.

Each example, if clearly laid out, provides parents and players a road map for parenting, coaching and supporting. You may disagree with the stated goals but at least you know them and can guide your child accordingly.

Having coached in most of the sports my children play in, this type of conversation is seldom had and parents are left on the side of the field wondering why their child did not make a team, or how to guide their child based on a rotation of coaches and philosophies.

In case you are wondering, my personal philosophy for sports should be on total player development toward character, teamwork and life skills. Winning is when justice, empowerment and love are upheld not based on the score. When parents and players alike can support and cheer an individual achieving their goal, a town cheering its children, and teams with smiling faces and laughing bellies we have won as a town. When we cheer a team or player showing love and courage the score fades into the background because the real score becomes clear - love wins and evil loses. And we need more of that in our world - more love, less evil.

Our children are living in traumatized times, sport can be a place where trauma is pushed back and unity rises to the top. To all the town sports, make your goals clear, invite us into the conversation and let's choose the right goals for our children and society.