Unsurprisingly, this "stranger danger" exists outside the TV world, and is a very real dynamic in our world today. It is present in almost every sphere of life - from sport to work, formal to informal, political to religious the fear of the others exists.
It is killing us.
It is killing our ability to grow as people.
It is killing our ability to succeed as a species.
It is killing our nations.
It is killing our earth.
It is killing our children, women and men...at home and abroad.
We live under the tyranny of the fear of the others.
I have heard terrible things said of The Others:
- "liberal, socialist, communist freedom hating"
- "fascist, racist, mysgonist"
- "Radical Islamist"
- "Bigoted Christofacist"
- "Uneducated fundamentalist"
Sadly, I am no different when it comes to "The Others" in my life...and that needs to change.
Two words stand out for me as weapons against the tyrrany of fear we all seem to be overwhelmed by these days: empathy and embrace.
Empathy
There is a shortage of empathy in our culture today. We are driven by soundbites, news by 60 second media clip; policy by 144 characters, and argument by status update. Yet, what I find sparse, is our ability to think, feel and examine an issue from the perspective of the other. This interesting definition and associated articles on empathy is interesting: read here.
I believe that a way forward for me into this new world we live in is to engage and increase my ability to be empathic. For me, this means increasing listening before (or better, without) speaking; searching for the emotions expressed by the other, and discovering the dreams in the other.
Listen.
Search.
Discover.
I fail at this often. I need to be better.
Embrace
I need to embrace more of the others in my life. Embrace is a difficult word because it too often gets wrapped up with endorse. Embrace does not mean endorse. Embrace does not mean agree with the other. Embrace means welcome...into relationship, into conversation, into understanding. Embrace means committing to finding a better way. Embrace means work for a common solution.
Embracing the other is very hard to do without empathy. So, for me, the work of listening, searching, and discovering is about finding the means towards embracing. I need to embrace more of the others in my life. My world is too limited, my knowledge too sparse, and my opinions too one sided to face the complexity of this world.
Does embracing mean danger?
Absolutely!
Will it lead to mistakes and pain?
Highly likely.
Can it be avoided?
Yes
Should it be avoided?
I don't believe so, because our world is descending into chaos without it and I believe in a God who describes himself as "Other" and who engaged in empathy and embracing in its entirety.
For those who don't know, I am a Christian and I work as a pastor. At the core of my belief is a description of God as Holy, Holy, Holy. The word used for Holy, means to be set apart. In other words, to be different, to be other. God describes himself as the Set Apart, Set Apart, Set Apart God. He describes himself as the Other, Other, Other God.
But that's not where it's left. Instead, Paul, an early leader of the Christian movement, writes in Philippians about the empathic and embracing work of Jesus.
5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
7 rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
Philippians 2:5-8 The New International Version 2011. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.
While Jesus lived he encountered the full breadth of the human experience and with it experienced all three types of empathy. The Bible describes Jesus experiencing sadness, anger, loneliness, trepidation and excitement. He, after experiencing this empathy, embraced us all by providing a way to reunite with God.
So, it makes me wonder...if that's what the God is serve did for me in my alienation from him...am I not compelled to offer the same to the "others" in my life?
I believe the answer for me is yes: from those close to me those farthest from me in thought, I will work to increase my empathy and seek ways to embrace.
Join me, because I need your help, to do it.
