Do you know what betrayal tastes like?
Not just feels like…but tastes?
The taste of bile and adrenalin that floods your mouth as you realize
the person you love has left you, broken your trust, betrayed your heart and
their pledge. Do you know what betrayal tastes like?
Parents, you know a little of what I mean. You’ve given time, energy,
effort and perseverance to developing those you love in your lives, and now, as
these beings you call your children, come to the end of their high school or
college studies they have the audacity to leave home with a joy and pleasure
that feels like a betrayal!
Of course, I’m joking about that. It’s not really a betrayal, but it
does hurt. It does cause grief, and sometimes, it even causes that taste of
bitterness in your mouth.
But some parents know the heartache of children who walk away from them
in anger and hatred, becoming estranged.
There are other people who know the depth of pain and grieve that comes
from other betrayals. Like business partners, working together only to see
their dream of a business venture disappear as a partner betrays a trust and
breaks the deal.
And then of course, lovers, people who have committed to each other
only to discover that love has been given to another, shared with someone else,
maybe even others. That taste that floods you, is like a wave of emotion, a
tsunami of pain and sorrow, that leaves you devastated, unable to continue or
function.
I have heard stories of people unable to move from the feeling.
Overwhelmed, stuck on the couch, stuck in bed, feeling numb, only for the
numbness to go away and a searing pain to resume. I have heard stories of a
depth of emotional pain so intense, that beyond taking your breath away, it
physically debilitates you.
Do you know that sort of betrayal?
If you do, I am sorry. I am sorry that you have endured that and
experienced that. I am sorry that you have had to go through that, or are going
through that. It is unimaginable pain and I hope and pray you find a way to win
over that grief.
Maybe as you sit here, you know the other side of that equation. You
are the betrayer. You know the pain and heartache your actions have brought you
and those you love. You know the taste of betrayal in a different way. My words
today aren’t designed to open old wounds, or brokenness that has been healed.
There is no judgment in my words, just a recognition of the pain on both sides.
If you have reconciled what has happened, please, focus on the reconciliation,
not the mistake.
We are continuing our series called Three Little Words – a love story
between a man – Hosea, and a woman – Gomer. A love story that is a metaphor of
God’s love for his people, a love story that is a metaphor of God’s love for
us. As we bring our series to a close today, we will find that Hosea and Gomer
know this feeling of betrayal.
In each week, we have discovered a little word, a word on which the
story hinges. The story seemingly headed in one direction, spins around these
little words and finds a new direction.
In week one we discovered the little word “So” which led us to the
identity of being chosen.
In week two we discovered the little word “Yet” which led us to the
action of being loved.
We learned that our descriptions are not our definitions and that the
names we bear or are called are not obstacles to God’s love.
SO…YET…CHOSEN…LOVED.
So how will this story conclude? How will this love story end? Let’s
find out.
Remember, we are using a three-step plotline from love stories to guide
our time:
·
the introduction of the characters,
·
a conflict and
·
a resolution.
Tragedies resolve negatively, comedies resolve positively. Let’s see
how this one resolves.
Our characters, Hosea and Gomer and their children are embroiled in
conflict. Gomer and Hosea are separated. Gomer has betrayed Hosea, again it
would seem. The children are gone from the story, Gomer is gone from the house.
Hosea, sits alone, with His God, feeling the sting and taste of betrayal. If
you know that feeling and taste, then you know what Hosea is going through
right now. As the tidal waves of emotion hit him, he hears God speaking to him.
Amid this conflict, God speaks to Hosea
The Lord said to
me, “Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another man
and is an adulteress. Love her as the Lord loves the Israelites…
Hosea 3:1 (NIV)
Those are some
hard words from God for Hosea.
Overcoming
betrayal and welcoming someone back into relationship is a herculean task.
There are some who can do it, but also many more who can’t. The reasons are
many for those who can’t. It could be because of personal inability, lack of
trust, avoidance of pain, sheer emotional and mental exhaustion, fear or a
myriad of other reasons. For those who can make that move, it is impressive.
But this was God’s
call on Hosea, a call he predicted from the beginning, a task he had shared
with Hosea from the start. Hosea, in reflection and consideration, needed to
respond.
Just a quick time
out and a reminder: the story of Hosea and Gomer is not a story about marriage
counseling or reconciliation, or how to find a spouse, or raise children. Keep
in mind, while it may have similarities, it is a unique story with a very specific
message – a metaphor of God’s love and relationship with His people, who were
being unfaithful in their spiritual practices. While you can certainly, draw
some principles and ideas for other situations, its primary purpose is the
story of God’s love for his people. Ok…time in. Back to Hosea’s response to
God’s request.
We don’t know the
time involved, or the debate that possibly raged between Hosea and God. We
don’t know the work involved to overcome the emotional onslaught of betrayal.
We don’t know the pain endured or healing sought by Hosea, but we do know his
response.
So I bought her
for fifteen shekels of silver and about a homer and a lethek of barley. Hosea
3:2 (NIV)
Hosea responds
with action. He seeks out Gomer, finds her where she is, negotiates a price for
her and buys her back. Gomer’s choices have caused her to be desolate.
There is
speculation about what sort of desolation Gomer is experiencing. Some say she
is a prostitute at a temple, trapped in a type of slavery as the last place she
can find protection in her day and age, others say she is literally a slave to
another household, while still others say she is in debt, caught without means
to lift herself out of her poverty. Regardless of the specifics, the reality is
Gomer is trapped, enslaved by her choices, their consequences and her
circumstances, unable to solve the problems of her life. The image of her life
is one of slavery and under control of others. It is not the image of love and
connection God designed for her. She is feeling the bitter taste of her
betrayal,
Gomer’s state
reminds us that there is another side to betrayal. It isn’t only the
betrayed person who feels the taste of betrayal. The betrayer feels something
too. There are many reasons why someone might betray a loved one – weakness,
greed, selfishness, brokenness, fear, the offer of something better, confusion,
abuse, neglect, humiliation. We don’t know why Gomer betrayed Hosea, but those
choices have left her worse off. That’s the other side to betrayal.
Betrayal hurts the betrayed and the betrayer. The betrayer experiences
loss and grief too. The betrayer feels shame, guilt, fear and hopelessness. The
betrayer feels overwhelmed by their own choices and the pain those choices have
caused. And for Gomer, that betrayal meant a lifestyle that was far from the
good life Hosea offered. For Gomer, her betrayal led to slavery.
But Hosea offers
her a release from that slavery and a welcome into something else. Freedom. Hosea
knows where she is, knows what she needs and is willing to do it. He seeks her
out and buys her back. He not only buys her back, he offers her love and
connection again. He frees her from slavery and then offers something else.
Then I told her,
“You are to live with me many days; you must not be a prostitute or be intimate
with any man, and I will behave the same way toward you.”
Hosea 3:3 (NIV)
Hosea offers more
than freedom from slavery. He offers her freedom for relationship. She could have been left in slavery. She could
have been left as a victim of her choices or her circumstances. She could have
been discarded by Hosea for what happened. BUT He seeks her out, buys her back
and restores her to relationship, and it all hinges on this little word in our
passage – the word BUT.
It occurs twice
actually, and it’s the same Hebrew word from the previous two weeks that we
translated as “so” and “yet”. The word is “Wa” It is also translated as “but”
in other contexts. It’s this tiny word, one letter in Hebrew, a single pen stroke,
BUT, what a difference that pen stroke makes to our story.
We find it in
verse two: “So, I bought her…” The word “so” makes sense in English. The word
“but” makes sense in the plot. Gomer is lost and enslaved through no fault of
Hosea, BUT, he pursues her anyway. Gomer’s life is heading in a specific
direction, living with promiscuity, a person who is loved, but treated as
property, defined as chosen but ignored as inferior. BUT Hosea enters and
redeems her. He reminds her she is chosen, shows her she is loved and connects
her back to a vital relationship. He frees her!
Here’s the interesting
thing about this passage in Hosea 3 though. The entire passage begins with the
same Hebrew word we translate as “so”, “yet” or “but”. In English, the chapter begins
with “The Lord said…”, but in Hebrew the passage reads, “But the Lord said,…”.
It is as though the entire story has led to this point and the greatest turn of
all in the story hinges on this tiny word which isn’t even in English – But God…
This little word
is the climactic moment in the love stories we enjoy. It is the arrival of
Richard Gere to rescue Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. It is the boom box
serenade from Say Anything. It is the moment in LA Story when Steve Martin’s
character is asked – what would he do if his love interest were to go:
Harris: All I know is, on the day your plane was to leave, if I had
the power, I would turn the winds around, I would roll in the fog, I would
bring in storms, I would change the polarity of the earth so compasses couldn't
work, so your plane couldn't take off.
This moment in the
story, this moment in the Bible, this moment for you and for me is that
dramatic moment in the love story where the story can be resolved. God knows
the bitter taste of betrayal – Gomer’s betrayal, Israel’s betrayal, our
betrayal. Hosea stands before her offering love once again. God stands before
us offering love once again. But he not only offers love…his offering something
more, something powerful, something for which our hearts and spirits yearn. God
is offering freedom!
Despite the bitter
taste of betrayal for God, the betrayed, and us, the betrayers, we are offered
freedom. Just like Gomer is freed from slavery and freed for relationship, so
we can be freed from whatever enslaves us and freed for a relationship with
God.
Hosea’s words to
Gomer are an invitation, “You are to live
with me many days; you must not be a prostitute or be intimate with any man,
and I will behave the same way toward you”.
The offer is one
where God promises to be faithful, and asks us to be the same. It is an offer
of reconciliation, redemption, renewal, revival. No longer do we need to taste
the bitterness of betrayal, no longer will God hold against us the failures of
our unfaithfulness, instead he offers us a future. He offers a future of
freedom.
I don’t know where
you are in this love story of God and you.
Maybe you’re at
the beginning and all this talk of slavery and betrayal doesn’t make sense to
you. That’s ok. We hope you will keep coming back with your questions. In fact,
we have a great group designed just so you can ask questions called Starting
Point. The people at The Hub will help you find out more about it.
Or maybe you’re a
Christian. Someone in that relationship and enjoying the benefits that it
offers. That’s great. Keep enjoying it and sharing it with others.
But maybe you know
exactly what I’m talking about when I talk about feeling trapped by your
choices. Maybe you are here, unsure about this faith thing, because you don’t
like where your life is going and you want something else. You see the
direction your life is headed and you don’t like it. You want something else.
You hope there is something else. You might not use the word betrayal, but as
I’ve been speaking, the taste that comes to mind feels similar.
And then, maybe
you are here, a Christian, or at least you thought you were one once. But
something went wrong, something happened in your life that made you doubt this
whole God thing. Or maybe something happened, maybe it’s something you did and
you feel like Gomer feels – ashamed, guilty, fearful, weighed down by the
mistakes you’ve made. And now you wonder about your life. You see the direction
your life is headed and it’s like a trap and you can’t get out of it. You’ve
betrayed God and you’re stuck, in chains, in slavery, to your choices.
For those people,
the ones who see their lives heading in a direction they don’t want it to go I
want to remind you of Hosea 3:1 – BUT GOD.
Regardless of
whether it is the first time you are considering God, or if you want
desperately to come back, remember, BUT GOD.
If you feel
hopeless and wish for something better, yet you are certain there is no way
out…BUT GOD.
If you feel
trapped and convinced you have no worth or value…BUT GOD.
If you feel lost
and alone without relationship or hope…BUT GOD.
If you feel angry
and frustrated…BUT GOD
If you feel
trapped by addiction…BUT GOD
If you feel
railroaded by life…BUT GOD
BUT GOD enters and
changes the direction of your life from trapped to freed. And that’s the big
gift he offers you today. You might be caught in the traps of your own choices,
you might feel worthless and lost, hopeless and alone, BUT GOD offers you
freedom.
He will free you
from that prison and free you for something better. He will free you from your
failures, from your mistakes, from your deepest regrets and shame and free you
for relationship, free you for love, free you for joy. He will free you from
your betrayal and free you for a love relationship with him once again.
Here’s what David,
a king of Israel, who lived with many failures and regrets including murder and
adultery, said about the freedom God offers,
22 God
pays for each slave’s freedom;
no one who runs to him
loses out.
Psalm
34:22 (MSG)
God has already done
the work of freeing you through Jesus Christ. Paul wrote this to people in the
city of Galatia back in the first century.
It is for freedom
that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be
burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
Galatians 5:1
(NIV)
Later, in the same
chapter, but a different translation, Paul writes the following about God’s
work for us.
It is absolutely
clear that God has called you to a free life. Galatians 5:13 (MSG)
Let Freedom Ring
Hosea and Gomer model
that God chooses us.
They reveal us
that God loves us
They declare that
God frees us.
There is something
about this concept of freedom that captures our hearts and minds. From fiction
to reality, we are attracted to stories of people being freed. Like that iconic
moment in the movie Braveheart when William Wallace shouts freedom. Or the drum
beat refrain of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr; “let freedom ring”
Let freedom
ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!
Let freedom
ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!
But not
only there; let freedom ring from the Stone Mountain of Georgia!
Let freedom
ring from Lookout Mountain in Tennessee!
Let freedom
ring from every hill and molehill in Mississippi. From every mountainside, let
freedom ring.
ending with the
words many of us know so well, “free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty
I am free at last”. Or the moving moment Nelson Mandela echoed those same words
after the first democratic election in South Africa that finally people could,
with joy loudly proclaim from the rooftops – free at last.
Or the most
powerful words of all, said by Jesus himself,
“if the Son sets
you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36 (NIV)
Do you want to be free?
That is the question left for us from this series. Do you want to be
free? I find it noteworthy that Hosea makes an offer to Gomer, but we never
hear Gomer’s response. They disappear from the story. The rest of the book of
Hosea is made up of prophetic statements. Gomer’s response is not recorded.
Here’s why I think that is.
It isn’t important to our story to know what Gomer said. Because we are
Gomer in the story. The question is left unanswered because we need to answer
it.
Jesus has sought you out, bought you back at a price and now makes an
offer of a relationship with you. He is asking you, “Do you want to be free?”
Where in your life have you drifted off course? What have you done in
your life that you think is unforgiveable, irredeemable, or forcefully
resistant to restoration? Where do you need a “But God…” intervention? That can
happen today…But God can be faithful. But God can buy you back. But God can
show love again. But God can restore you….But God can free you?
Do you want to be free?
Do you want to be free from your past?
Do you want to be free from your failures?
Do you want to be free from your regrets?
Do you want to be free from the chains enslaving you?
AND
Do you want to be free for a life with Jesus?
Do you want to be free for the joy he has for you?
Do you want to be free for the wonderful things you will do together in
this world he created?
These aren’t rhetorical questions: do you want to be free?
“Do you want to be free?”
If you want to be
free, I want to pray for you. First I want to pray for us together, for the
times in our lives we have been betrayed and the times in our lives when we
have betrayed others. Then I would like to invite us together to stand and pray
a simple prayer accepted the offer of Jesus to be free.
Jesus, I accept your offer of freedom. Help me to live free.
Here’s what Paul
writes to people who have accepted the offer of Jesus to be free:
It is absolutely
clear that God has called you to a free life. Just make sure that you don’t use
this freedom as an excuse to do whatever you want to do and destroy your
freedom. Rather, use your freedom to serve one another in love; that’s how
freedom grows.
If you
prayed that prayer, then you are free. Now use your freedom to serve one
another in love; that’s how freedom grows, that’s how freedom rings, that’s how
more and more people can begin to say, free at last, free at last, thank God
Almighty I am free at last.